


Under Lock and Key.

by robron_til_the_end



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: M/M, Original Character(s), Prison, Prison AU, taking canon and using it as a springboard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-02-07 05:58:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 12,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21453148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robron_til_the_end/pseuds/robron_til_the_end
Summary: Prison guard au. Robert was sentenced to 14 years in prison for killing L** when he was 25. He's served 5 years of his sentence when new guards are assigned to the prison. One of those guards is Aaron Livesy. They've never met before, but there's just something intriguing about the other man...
Relationships: Aaron Dingle/Robert Sugden
Comments: 187
Kudos: 252





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This entire idea is @susieskinner93's fault over on tumblr!! I hope you enjoy this, and updates might be sporadic! I am also making my own "rules" about how prisons operate, so I'm not pretending this is accurate.

All prison was was a routine. That’s all it was when you came down to it. You get up at the same time, eat breakfast at the same time, do your job at the same time, your free time at the same time (what a laugh that was. Free time?) Lights out at ten thirty. It becomes so routine that Robert finds himself almost sleepwalking through it. Five years of this, nine more to go. He’s a good chunk of the way through, but another decade of this? God, he needed something just to keep his mind going.

That’s when the rumours started that new guards were arriving. Robert didn’t think much of it, why would he? It didn’t matter whoever held the keys to the building that locked him up. Robert hadn’t anticipated that one of the guards? He’d change Robert’s life.

* * *

Aaron never thought he’d be here, smoothing down his uniform for his first day. Him, a prison guard? It felt like it was impossible, but they were all about PR these days, and having someone employed who had a slightly… well, coloured past, always in a bit of trouble, but the police had never managed to make much stick. But they wanted to show that “rehabilitation works” in a new government program, so his previous arrests? They’d been erased and now he had a good, nine to five job that paid far better than shifts at Cain’s garage would have. Enough to be able to afford his own flat.

But even so, he felt nervous. He’d passed the training with flying colours, and he knew today he was just being walked through it. Honestly, most of it was probably going to be standing and watching, and he could do that, easily.

* * *

Robert woke up, staring at the top bunk above him. He hadn’t meant to fall asleep, it was about two in the afternoon, but today was always a strange one. It was the anniversary of when he was sentenced. Fourteen years. He’d served five of them now, but he still had nine long years to go. He’d be nearly forty when he would be up for release. Robert got out of bed, grabbing his book that he’d been halfway through when lights out was called the night before and stretched out in bed to sink into the words again. But it didn’t work, he kept thinking back five years to when he’d been sentenced. Just twenty five, and soon more of his adult life would have been spent inside a prison than out of it.

He knew he was supposed to repent and regret what he’d done to land himself with a life sentence, but he didn’t. He just wish he’d hit the bastard harder. Anyway, nothing to do now. It was over, now all he had was the memory of it. He shifted on the bed, trying to get as comfy as the thin mattress would allow, trying it again. He’d just about got back into the book when his cell door banged shut. Robert got up, because that was unusual in the middle of the afternoon. The doors were kept open.

“You lock it like that,” a woman said. “They’re all the same.” Robert waited as the door swung open, two guards coming in with the chain of keys. He recognised the woman, Cath, she was a tired looking woman clearly working out until her retirement. Robert had a respect for her, because she was firm, but she did her job well. and it looked like she was showing a new guy around. Robert didn’t recognise him at all, and you did get to know the guards. Who to avoid, who was a soft touch. 

“Who are you?” Robert asked, using his height to tower over the newbie, young. Early twenties?

“Livesy,” he said. “A new guard.”

“Mm,” Robert said, sizing him up. He looked like he’d be able to handle himself in a fight, that much was sure. 

“And you are?” Livesy asked him. Robert stared him down, inmates had a reputation to uphold after all.

“Sugden,” he said after a long pause. “How many new guards are we getting Cath?”

“Only three,” she said. “One of them’s a new girl who won’t last five minutes.”

“Why’s that?” Robert asked.

“She’s way too beautiful so keep your hands off,” Cath said pleasantly. Robert raised his eyebrows a touch.

“Why would you think I’d go near her?” Robert asked.

“A pretty boy like you?” she said, half teasing. “I’ll show you the kitchen area,” she added to Aaron, who nodded. Robert watched them leave his cell, then after about two seconds, he followed out the door, watching their retreating backs. Livesy, the new guard turned around and looked at Robert again, looking him up and down. He went around the corner, and Robert smirked to himself.

Interesting.

* * *

Aaron liked Cath. The no nonsense approach and he felt glad that she was showing him around. She showed him how to lock the cells up with the master keys, and that’s when he met him.

Most of the prisoners were in the common rooms, so he hadn’t expected anyone to be in their cell, though Cath didn’t seem surprised. He was tall, and seemed quiet, though when Aaron had asked his name, he hadn’t liked that at all, almost putting his guard up.

It had been an almost overwhelming day, getting to grips with everything. He knew prisons weren’t happy places, obviously, but some of the inmates certainly had their backs up and were willing to get into a fist fight at the first provocation. It was going to be a job where he always had to be on his guard. He wasn’t the biggest of men, but he could fight with the best of them if he needed to. There were three maybe that Aaron would not like to meet in a dark alley, but they weren’t the ones he kept coming back to. The one that Aaron kept thinking of was Sugden and he didn’t know why.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the encouragement on chapter one! I'm going to repeat, I'm making up the prison details to suit the story, it's not meant to be reflective of UK prisons!

Robert flicked through one of his cellmates top shelf magazines absently. All right, it had been a while since he’d seen boobs, so kill him. He quickly put it back as he heard footsteps, James coming back to their cell. What threw Robert was that he was smiling, because James wasn’t a smiley happy person, generally.

“What’s up?” Robert asked.

“I’ve been talking to the new guard,” he said, clearly pleased with himself.

“Which one?”

“Ella,” James said. “She’s gorgeous.”

“I’ve not seen her,” Robert said absently.

“Have you been in here reading all day?” James said.

“They can’t lock my mind up, no matter how much they might like to,” Robert said. He didn’t know exactly what James had done or been convicted of, but Robert felt pretty sure there was a murder in there somewhere, and he’d been in prison since he was eighteen. It meant that even though he looked slight and small, he’d been here long enough to know how to handle himself in prison. All things said, he was a good ally for Robert to have, and there could have been worse people to be sharing a cell with. Robert wouldn’t like to get on the wrong side of him though.

“You don’t want to get tangled up with a guard,” Robert warned. “She’ll make your life incredibly difficult.”

“What more can they do to me?” James asked with a shrug. “I don’t have much to lose.” Robert closed his mouth.

* * *

Aaron found himself enjoying the job, quite surprisingly. It wasn’t as easy as he’d expected, it wasn’t simply standing and watching, he had to constantly be on the alert and there were a handful of men that Aaron didn’t trust to even turn away from for ten seconds. There were two guards he worked closely with, one was Cath who he liked, and the other was Phil, who he didn’t. Phil seemed to be so strict, having to do everything by the book even when it made their lives more difficult, rather than live and let live.

For lunch, Aaron liked to avoid the break room. He didn’t feel like chatting with them and wanted to be alone. He couldn’t leave the prison while on shift, so he had to find somewhere else. After a week, he’d decided on the library. Most inmates were in the cafeteria at that time, so he could get some peace.

* * *

Robert went to the library, wanting to swap his book for a new one. He liked to spend time perusing the books. The library was usually about two years behind bookshops on the outside, but beggars couldn’t be choosers. He also liked having the space pretty much to himself. There were always a few people looking through massive legal books to try and find loopholes in their cases or ways to appeal, but otherwise the library was mostly untouched. Robert liked finding places he could be alone, so he took his time picking a book.

He hadn’t expected to go around one of the stacks and find one of the prison guards eating lunch, sat on a chair in the corner. Livesy, one of the new batch. He looked surprised to see Robert there himself.

“Why are you here?” Robert asked. It wasn’t in a friendly tone either. Livesy put his sandwich down and stood up, even though he couldn’t match Robert’s height.

“Why are _you_ here?” Livesy countered.

“I’m within my rights to stay in the library as long as I choose,” Robert said darkly. “You shouldn’t be here.”

Livesy flinched. “I know, but I can’t be bothered with the other guards chatting about their families over lunch, I just wanted some silence.” Robert looked at him in surprise, his hostility fading with Livesy’s honesty. “Why aren’t you in the cafeteria?”

Well, as Livesy had been honest with him… “I don’t like the lunches they cook,” Robert said. “I skip it and have dinner which is far better. I like to be alone sometimes.”

“You never get to be alone do you,” Livesy said, and Robert bristled.

“Is that a threat?” he hissed.

“No!” Livesy said. “No, I meant… I was only thinking out loud.” He seemed honest, so for a moment, Robert decided to let his prison view fall. Thinking everyone was always out for themselves, wanting to make his life hell, lying to him. This guy seemed to be what he said. A guard wanting a quiet spot for lunch. Livesy sat back down, turning his attention to his sandwich, almost deflating. Robert tried to be friendly, having almost forgotten how to do it when he wasn’t after something.

“Do you read?” Robert asked. Livesy shook his head.

“No. It’s not my kind of thing.”

“What is your kind of thing?” Robert asked. Livesy looked at him. Bright blue eyes, almost piercing and Robert wondered if he’d overstepped.

“Cars,” Livesy said. “I’m a fair mechanic. Or I used to be, I guess.”

“Change of career path?” Robert asked. Pushing gently.

“I didn’t want to work for family any more,” Livesy said. “It got too complicated.”

“Yeah, family is… yeah.”

“Have you got… family?” Livesy asked. “I shouldn’t ask, but I’m technically off duty. For another fifteen minutes anyway.”

Robert considered this. Information was power inside, so being careful about what you said to who mattered. “I’ve got a baby sister,” he said. “She doesn’t visit much, but she’s safe and happy. My parents are dead.” He said it in a way that Livesy knew the topic was closed. He didn’t want to mention his son. Just in case, it was always better not to.

“I’ve got a little sister,” Livesy said. “She doesn’t live here, so I only see her a few times a year.” Robert watched him and realised he was giving information for information, making the playing field level between them when he didn’t have to. That was… more kind and thoughtful that most guards were. It was a small act, but an important one.

“I bet you don’t even remember my name,” Robert said.

“Yeah, I do,” Livesy said. “Sugden. You’ve not told me your first name yet.”

“I don’t know yours either, Livesy.” The guard grinned and Robert’s heart flipped. God, he was gorgeous when he smiled. The worry, the weight of the world dropped away from him and he looked younger, freer and Robert found himself smiling at him in spite of himself. He almost wanted to ask Livesy to stand up again so he could get a proper look at him.

“I am actually here to swap books,” Robert said, holding his old copy for Livesy to see.

“What do you like to read?”

“Thrillers mostly,” Robert said. “Stephen King’s good.” Livesy nodded. They both heard people coming and Robert nodded, and stepped away from him, going back to looking at the bookshelves, like nothing had ever happened.

* * *

Aaron watched Sugden as he reached up to grab a book and read the blurb. He must be taller than six foot and he was attractive. Even without the luxuries of the outside world, Aaron could see that. Aaron had the choice of finding out everything about Sugden if he wanted to. Name, date of birth, crime, sentence. All he’d have to do was type his last name and prison number into the database that Cath had taught him how to use. It would take him five minutes. But he didn’t want to for some reason. He’d prefer it if Sugden talked to him. He wasn’t like the others, he didn’t treat him like it was Aaron’s personal responsibility that he was locked up. Inmates tended to act us versus them, but Sugden, at least one on one, he didn’t.

He’d found a book he liked, flashed a smile in Aaron’s direction, then left. Aaron watched him go, and picked up the book that Robert had abandoned, having finished with it. A well thumbed paperback. Aaron didn’t know if he’d ever read a book from start to finish, it really wasn’t what he wasted his time doing. For some reason, he didn’t know why, he took the book home with him.


	3. Chapter 3

“You’re not listening to a word I’m saying, are you?” 

“What?” Robert swung around to see James looking at him blankly over breakfast. No. The truth was he hadn’t been listening, he’d been focusing on Livesy about twelve feet away, overseeing and making sure no fights broke out in the cafeteria. Livesy had caught his eye, but only twice, and Robert couldn’t decide if he was being purposefully ignored, or whether Robert had imagined the connection between them. It had only been one conversation in the library after all. “Oh, no, sorry. Distracted.”

“By what?” James asked. He turned, seeing where Robert was looking, and misinterpreted the gaze. Ellie, the new female guard was chatting to Livesy and James looked at Robert. “You’re not going near her,” he warned.

“Eh? Oh, no,” Robert said, realising what he meant. “No, of course not.”

“I mean it Robert,” James said, very threatening. “You’ve got your pretty blonde wife who visits, back off.”

“She’s not my wife,” Robert said, by instinct. The only reason Rebecca visited in the first place was for Seb. And even then it was only about three times a year because she didn’t want to “disrupt” him too much. If he was being reasonable, Robert would have agreed, but he wasn’t in the mood to be reasonable when it came to his son.

“You do not want to go after her!”

“I’m not after her!” Robert hissed. “Shut up about it, okay?!” James didn’t look convinced and Robert wolfed down his eggs, leaving the cafeteria as quickly as possible after that. James watched him go, and Robert knew that one wasn’t over.

Robert tried to brush shoulders with Livesy on the way out, but he misjudged it and ended walking past thin air instead. 

* * *

Aaron wondered if it was a coincidence or was Sugden trying to catch his eye? He wasn’t sure, but when he’d finished breakfast, Sugden walked incredibly close to him, and Aaron decided that yes, he had been trying to get his attention. You need to be careful here, an internal voice said to Aaron. But then, he knew himself, and he rarely took the safe route.

He spoke to Ellie about taking charge of the cafeteria, and he followed Sugden back to the cells.

Sugden must have heard him following, because he turned to face Aaron, looking angry, and Aaron wondered if he’d completely misinterpreted it. But when he recognised Aaron, his face calmed and Aaron realised it wasn’t him he was angry with.

“Who peed in your breakfast?” Aaron asked. Sugden let out a short laugh.

“Don’t give them any ideas,” he said, but a smile was hovering on his lips. Beautiful. He really was, Aaron thought to himself. His nose was slightly wonky, but it almost enhanced his charm. “You’re busy,” Sugden said, almost waving his hand.

“Yeah, you go and read your book,” Aaron said with a raised eyebrow. Sugden laughed, nodded then retreated.

* * *

Robert could feel the tension between him and James over the next few days, even though nothing was said. It felt like Robert needed to sleep with one eye open these days. Ellie’s name hadn’t come up again, but Robert knew James was marking his territory. It didn’t seem to matter that Robert had no interest in her.

Just before lunch one day, Ellie had “by coincidence” walked past his cell, and James snapped, lashing out and pinning Robert to the wall of the cell, James’s arm across Robert’s throat.

“It’s nothing to do with me!” Robert gasped, trying to get free. James was deceptively strong. Robert twisted free and the scuffle turned into a full blown fight, and before Robert knew it, Livesy was physically pulling them apart

“Alright enough!” Livesy shouted, his hands fisted in Robert’s T shirt and holding him back. They locked eyes, Robert breathless and he forgot fighting James for a moment. Livesy didn’t let go of him and Robert realised that he was holding onto him a little too long.

“I think you’ve made your point,” Robert said harshly, shrugging Livesy off. Livesy looked down at the ground, almost like he’d been caught out and Robert’s interest ignited. He was interested in him. He’d suspected before, but then half of it could be his imagination from prison boredom, but it wasn’t anymore, Robert was convinced of it.

* * *

Aaron panicked. He’d broken up a fight between Sugden and his cellmate and it was the first time he’d touched Sugden. He wouldn’t have planned it that way at all, but having Sugden’s body tense under Aaron’s hands, because he clearly wanted to fight back… Aaron hadn’t expected it. And that moment where Sugden looked at him, the fight having gone out of him and simply looking at Aaron for those few seconds? That meant something. Sugden had a mask. He had the hard edge of him used to survive in prison, but Aaron had seen that mask fall a couple of times, and he wasn't like that underneath.

Aaron wondered if he should request to be moved to a different block, just for a week or so, but as soon as the thought entered his head, he dismissed it. He didn’t want to take himself outside Sugden’s sphere.

* * *

James hadn’t spoken to him after having his arm across Robert’s throat. Given that they shared a cell, that made things tense. “Mate, I’m not after Ellie. She didn’t come around here to see me, I’ve never even talked to her.” James didn’t say anything, but the silence from his bunk was maybe less charged.

That night in bed, Robert kept thinking about Livesy. He had only felt his hands on the front of his chest, pulling him and James apart, but that felt… Robert wasn’t exactly touch starved, but it had been quite some time. He had had sex while in prison, but only with someone he knew was being released within the week. He just didn’t want the entanglement and the headache of starting a relationship with someone while inside. Or that’s what he’d thought anyway. Starting anything, even friendship with a prison guard would be far far worse than anything he could start with an inmate. That wasn’t going to stop him.


	4. Chapter 4

Robert hadn’t seen Livesy for three days and it felt like longer. He assumed that he was having time off, or a weekend depending on how the shifts fell, but not having someone for his eyes to rest on bothered him more than it should do. So on the fourth morning when Robert did see him, he’d already decided what to do. He grabbed his book and he went to the library at lunch.

It didn’t surprise him to find Livesy with his sandwiches, looking up at Robert’s arrival. “Is this a coincidence?” Livesy asked.

“What else would it be?” Robert asked, looking at the bookshelves. “Did you have a good weekend?”

“Yeah,” Livesy said. “I went out for a few drinks with my mate. Adam.”

“A bar, a pub, a club?” Robert asked, wanting to know. He hadn’t had the luxury of going to any of them lately.

“A bar,” Livesy said. “Then we played a bit of darts and I slept off my hangover yesterday.”

“No pretty girlfriend to keep your bed warm?” Robert asked, looking at him. Livesy’s eyes sparkled. 

“No. Definitely not.”

Robert nodded. “Okay.” Then Robert pushed. “Are you ever going to have a girlfriend?” He wouldn’t ask outright if Livesy was gay or into men, but that was asking without being blunt.

Livesy looked around, then slowly shook his head. “No.”

“Good to know,” Robert said.

“Are you looking for another book?” Livesy asked.

“In theory,” Robert said. “I might not find anything to my tastes. I might have to come back tomorrow.” Livesy smiled.

* * *

Aaron was overseeing the outdoor exercise. Not many inmates had taken the opportunity to go outside today, it was raining quite a bit, but maybe a dozen had. Including Sugden who was jogging in the pouring rain. Aaron kept watching him, like his gaze was magnetised. Aaron had the hood on his coat up to protect him a little from the rain, but Sugden had no such protection. He only wore a T shirt and jogging bottoms on. He must be freezing.

He came inside after about twenty minutes and Aaron swallowed, seeing him dripping wet. “You’re going to catch your death,” Aaron said.

“I like being on my own,” Robert said. “It stops me losing my sanity.”

“I run,” Aaron offered. “It makes my mind quiet.” Sugden looked at him levelly.

“I know what you mean,” he said softly. Sugden took off his wet shirt, running a hand through his wet hair and Aaron had to look away. “Tempted?” Sugden teased, making Aaron look directly at him, challenging.

“What’s your name?” Aaron asked. Sugden simply looked at him, shirtless and wet which Aaron was trying not to think of.

“Yours first,” Sugden said. “You can find mine out, I can’t find yours out unless you tell me.”

“Aaron,” he said quietly. Sugden nodded.

“Robert.” Sugden… no, Robert, smirked at him, walking away and Aaron sighed. This meant trouble.

* * *

Staring at the bunk bed above his, Robert kept thinking of Aaron. He’d wanted to know his first name for a while. He’d even played a game with himself, seeing if he could guess, but he’d not landed on anything that seemed to fit. Aaron. He almost rolled the name around in his mouth, seeing how it sounded, but not enough to be heard by James in the top bunk. He’d purposefully flirted with Aaron, going out in the yard in the pouring rain. He’d guessed that if Aaron was interested in him, he wouldn’t be able to keep his eyes off him. Which had been absolutely true, and he was almost sure there was a flush on Aaron’s face underneath his stubble.

* * *

The next day Aaron got involved in a fight. Nothing to do with Robert, another inmate had managed to smuggle in a bottle of vodka, had got completely smashed and decided that attacking the guards was a great idea. That meant Aaron’s uniform had got ripped, so once the idiot had been restrained and dealt with, Aaron had to go and change into a fresh shirt. He used one of the counsellors offices because he was still on duty, but what he hadn’t expected was to see Robert watching from the open chink in the door. He locked eyes with him but Robert wasn’t moving.

Aaron felt a surge of confidence, because Robert was definitely checking him out. Aaron hadn’t even realised he’d left the door open, and while staring at Robert he moved to the door. But he didn’t close it, he pushed it an extra six inches open. Robert smirked at him, not a smile and Aaron didn’t look directly at him as he buttoned up a fresh shirt. When he was ready for work again, Robert was still outside.

“Have you finished?” Aaron asked sharply.

“I wanted to find you,” Robert said, and the flirting tone Aaron had almost got used to had faded and he sounded more serious. “Rumours are going wild about prisoner transfers. People being moved.”

“Yeah, there's a transfer next week,” Aaron said.

“Am I being moved? Can you tell me that?” Robert asked. “Please. I know you’re not supposed to, but…”

“No,” Aaron said. “That’s not what I mean. Half a dozen are being transferred in. No one’s leaving.”

“Oh,” Robert said, relieved. “Okay. Thanks.”

“I’m not supposed to say anything,” Aaron said.

“Right,” Robert said. “I’ve got it.” Aaron smiled as Robert turned away.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the massive gap between chapters! Thank you if you're sticking with it!

Robert couldn’t stop pleading on the phone. “Oh come on, I’ve been waiting months for this, you promised me.”

“I know, but somethings come up,” Rebecca said. “I don’t like rearranging, but I’m not thrilled about bringing Seb to a prison anyway.”

“It’s twice a year,” Robert said. “I’ve not seen photos of him for months either. Please. I don't care what's happening with that boyfriend of yours, he's my son.”

“All right,” she said, relenting. “I’ll be there tomorrow.”

“Thank you,” Robert said fervently. “I mean that Bex, you have no idea how much seeing him helps.”

“I’m not happy,” she said.

“Okay,” Robert said. “I am still paying child maintenance.” He was, his share of the Haulage company. Seb was basically all it paid for.

“Yeah, I know. I’ll bring him tomorrow.”

“Thanks.” Robert ended the call because there were others waiting to use the phone and moved aside. That’s when he realised Aaron had been watching him.

“You’ve got a kid,” Aaron said quietly. “I heard you.”

“You shouldn’t be listening,” Robert said. The calls were recorded, but it was polite for the guards not to eavesdrop unless it was suspected to be illegal activity.

“Okay,” Aaron said.

“Yeah, I do,” Robert said, as he turned to walk away. “Seb. He’s nearly six. I’ve spent five years of his life in prison, so seeing him when he visits with his mother… I need to see him.” Aaron almost looked disappointed and Robert couldn’t work out why.

“Okay,” Aaron said in a much deeper voice and Robert felt completely wrong footed. What the hell had he done wrong there?

* * *

Aaron watched Robert closely on visiting day. A beautiful blonde woman and a child who was clearly Robert’s. The same hair, the same eyes, he looked like Robert’s son. He was a bright and bubbly child who didn’t seem aware that he was visiting a prison, though the mother seemed less than happy about it. Robert was almost glued to every word the boy said, and Aaron caught a couple of mentions about school and art when he wandered up and down the visiting room. Trying to listen in, but not appear as if he was. 

When the buzzer rang for the end of visiting, Robert gave his son a huge hug, then swung him around, which made him laugh, before talking to the woman. Standing up, she looked even more beautiful than Aaron had first feared. Had he been a complete idiot? Thinking Robert could go for him? The man was probably straight as anything, but just using him to see what he could get. Aaron felt like shouting at himself for being such a fool.

* * *

Robert was on cloud nine from seeing Seb for at least two days afterwards. He’d grown so much and he was a lot more talkative these days. Also Seb really and truly remembered him now, which hadn’t always been the case when he’d been much younger. Seb had given him a piece of his artwork too, which Robert had beamed at. He was a proper child now and it felt amazing to him. He missed so much, stuck in here.

He went to the library out of habit, and smiled when he saw Aaron in his usual spot. However Aaron was almost glowering at him. “What’s up with you?”

“Is that how you speak to a guard?” Aaron said dully. Robert felt thrown. What? Just… what?

“Have I done something?” Robert asked.

“Nope,” Aaron said, popping the P on the word.

“I don’t know… why are you like this?”

Aaron looked both ways, making sure they were alone. “I saw your very gorgeous girlfriend the other day. You’ve been… well, you know, with me, and then there’s her?”

Robert smiled to himself, but not with humour. He moved down the library shelves until he found a dictionary. He found what he wanted, then almost shoved it in Aaron's lap. “That might clear up the confusion.” Robert’s thumb was pointing at the entry “bisexual.” It took a few seconds for Aaron to catch on, but by that time Robert had walked away, clearly upset and angry.

* * *

He hadn’t found a reason to bump into Robert for two days. Aaron had been keeping a headcount of the inmates going outside once they’d opened the yard and he knew a handful were missing, and it was a nice day, so that was rare. Robert was one of the missing ones. He shouldn’t be so aware of Robert’s movements, but he was.

“You stay outside and keep an eye on them,” Aaron told his colleague, Phil. “I’ll have a look after the stragglers.” Aaron didn’t wait for an answer, going back inside the prison. He found Robert, but not where he expected to. In the faith room. Robert sat alone in the quiet which meant that when Aaron opened the door it sounded very loud.

“Why aren’t you outside?” Aaron asked quietly, approaching him and sitting three seats away.

“Because I like it here,” Robert said.

“I wouldn’t have had you down as being religious,” Aaron said.

“I’m not,” Robert said. “It’s the only place I can be alone. I can just… exist and be.”

Aaron guessed his own presence wasn’t wanted and felt bad for interrupting. “I’m sorry. I’ll leave you to it.”

“You can stay,” Robert said quietly. “If you want to.” Robert sounded like he meant it, so Aaron smiled and stayed seated.

“I feel like a right idiot,” Aaron said. “About my outburst the other day.”

“She’s not anything to me,” Robert said. “She’s not been for a long time. I know she’s having trouble with her boyfriend at the moment and that’s why I had to fight to get her to bring Seb to the prison.”

“You’re… bi?”

“Yes,” Robert said. “I’m not ashamed of my attraction to men. It’s also not advertised.”

“Yes,” Aaron said, agreeing with that immensely. "I don't either."


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poking my head up. Hi!
> 
> I know it's been ages, but I definitely needed the break. I hated leaving this story undone. Just as a reminder, this ISNT based on UK prisons at all, I'm making up the details to suit me. I've also tweaked the canon timeline a lot, so Robert's 30, but was put in prison when he was 25, so canon stuff (Seb for example) happened a lot earlier.
> 
> I hope someone's still reading this!!

After knowing that they both liked men, Robert and Aaron weren’t alone with each other, even for a second for three days. It wasn’t that either man was avoiding the other, but it was like fate was conspiring against them sharing a moment. They could only look at each other across the cafeteria, trying to catch their attention. It was frustrating, because Robert at least felt he couldn’t push a little more, and he wanted to.

When Aaron was signing out at the end of his shift, he looked at the computer and wondered. He didn’t know what Robert was in prison for and the curiosity was killing him. He knew Robert was a long term prisoner, but not for what crime. Aaron was free to use the system, the idea was that inmates certain guards were wary of, you could get more information about them. Not in this case, obviously, but no one else needed to know that. Sod it, he’d just have a quick look. Aaron logged in, making sure to be quick about it. Even if it was technically allowed, he didn’t want anyone nosing in. He typed in Robert’s prison number (not that he had it memorised or anything) and looked at the covering document for his file. 

Robert Jacob Sugden. Parole date was sometime in about 9 years. Not anything close anyway. Sentence: First degree murder. Aaron looked at that phrase in black and white and froze. Murder? _Robert_? No, that couldn’t be. Aaron didn’t click on the files to get details of the case, because he didn’t want to know. Or rather, he did, desperately, but he wanted Robert to be the one to tell him. One other word did catch his attention before he clicked back to the login screen though. Guilty plea. So he hadn’t even tried to fight it.

Aaron had really wanted some questions about Robert’s crime answered. Instead, he had more questions than ever.

* * *

The next morning Aaron turned up on shift tired and restless. He hadn’t got much sleep last night because he kept imagining Robert killing someone. Some nameless man or woman whose life was cut short because of Robert, the guy he really fancied. He could admit that to himself in the middle of the night. Aaron wasn’t someone who needed people to be whiter than white. It wasn’t realistic. But murder? That was a bit more than Aaron would have put up with. But then… he’s in prison, what were you expecting? Aaron told himself. Of course he’d done something illegal. But killing someone? What if it had been a partner of his? God, that would be awful. You didn’t get many guilty pleas to murder so it had to be personal.

“You look a million miles away,” Robert said, keeping some distance between them as they were in public. “Okay?”

“Yeah,” Aaron said. “Fine.” Robert raised his eyebrows at the brush off but didn’t say anything, walking away. Robert did plan to meet Aaron in the library later though. Whether Aaron was aware of it or not.

* * *

Aaron must have wanted to talk because he was there before Robert who was clutching his book as an excuse to be here. “What’s wrong with you?” Robert asked.

“That’s no way to speak to an officer,” Aaron said harshly and Robert felt like he’d been physically knocked back for a moment.

“I thought…” Robert shrugged. “Never mind. My mistake Livesy.” He hadn’t imagined the connection between them, Robert knew he hadn’t but Aaron had clearly had some common sense knocked into him by someone and he was dropping it. Robert turned to leave.

“Wait.” Aaron didn’t shout, but Robert turned around anyway. “I looked you up on the database,” Aaron admitted, looking at the floor. Robert closed the gap between them, standing close to Aaron and trying to look threatening, Aaron could tell.

“And what did you find out?” Robert said lowly. Dangerously.

“I didn’t… click through for details,” Aaron said, now a bit nervous in spite of himself. “I wanted to know what you were in for.”

“You could have asked nicely,” Robert said.

“You wouldn’t have told me.”

“No,” Robert said. “It’s none of your business.”

“Murder?” Aaron said, pushing.

“Fuck off,” Robert said sharply, turning away from him.

“Robert…”

“Sugden to you,” he said sharply, one step away from balling his fists in Aaron’s shirt. He knew it wouldn’t get him anywhere, but having his past thrown at him had completely knocked him sideways. 

“Everything okay?” Both men saw Ellie watching them curiously.

“Fine,” Aaron said.

“Okay,” she said. “Livesy, we’re needed to check in the transfers.” Aaron nodded and followed her out of the library, leaving Robert watching him go.

* * *

Robert curled up in bed that night, well aware that he’d overreacted with Aaron. But he couldn’t help it, having his past thrown at him like that, the disappointment in Aaron’s eyes that Robert apparently wasn’t innocent. You’d have thought being in prison gave that away. But God, he hated letting Aaron down. He liked the way Aaron looked at him before. Not now, not like that. Plus Robert considered his crime to be one of the better things he’d done in life. He’d just been stupid and got caught.

He saw Aaron far before he’d have liked to, Aaron locking up the cell for the night. Aaron looked at James, then Robert, and he didn’t look away. Robert shook his head. He couldn’t say anything, not with James listening from the top bunk and he wasn’t sure how much he could say with just his eyes. Aaron nodded, turned the key and left, leaving Robert alone. Or as alone as it ever got.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the encouragement on the last chapter! A slightly speedier update this time! I know they're short, but I'm going for short regular updates, rather than abandoning it for 3 months.... ;) Again, thank you so much for commenting on this, they really help me stay motivated.

Robert saw Aaron slip into the faith room and felt surprised. It wasn’t usual to see guards here unless an event or gathering was happening. His instinct got the better of him and he followed Aaron inside, glad to find him alone. He sat one seat away, looking at Aaron. “Have you checked up on me any more?” Robert asked coldly.

“No,” Aaron said. “I wanted to know before we… well, before.”

“Yeah,” Robert said. “I’d have told you eventually.”

“What happened?” Aaron asked.

“Yes, I killed someone,” Robert said. “I killed someone who deserved it. Some people don’t deserve to live. Trust me.”

“Who?” Aaron asked. “What…”

“Someone who hurt my family,” Robert said. “If you want any more than that you either have to be patient and trust me, or just click on my file.” Aaron looked down.

“I shouldn’t have done that,” Aaron said.

“No,” Robert agreed.

“I can’t help it,” Aaron said. “You’re under my skin and I had to know…” he trailed off and Robert smiled. Under his skin was he? Good.

“Is there anywhere we can be alone?” Robert asked quietly.

“No,” Aaron said. The door opened and Aaron got up very quickly, looking away from Robert as another inmate came in. Robert left as soon as he could, feeling that maybe things were moving in the right direction. He should have known it was too good to last.

* * *

When Robert got back to his cell he found someone there who wasn’t a guard and wasn’t James. When he turned around, Robert recognised him instantly. Ross Barton. Oh shit.

“When did you get here?” Robert asked.

“I’ve just been transferred in,” he said. “I didn’t think you’d survive in prison.”

“I didn’t think I’d ever see you again,” Robert said. “Give that you’re in prison for attempting to kill me!” he added in a hiss. "How are you even in the same prison as me?"

“It must have been overlooked,” Ross said, shrugging and almost laughing. Robert wondered if Ross had become unhinged since being sent down. “How long did you get?”

“Fourteen years,” Robert said. “A guilty plea made it less.”

“I got eighteen,” Ross said. “I didn’t even kill anyone and I’ve got more than you.”

“Don’t shoot people when you can’t carry it through,” Robert said. “At least I managed to kill who I hated. But you? Useless. Pathetic. Weak. You couldn’t even own up to it when you were caught red handed.” Ross punched Robert in the stomach and he doubled over, wheezing.

“I’ll finish what I started,” Ross said. “That’s not a threat, it’s a promise.” By the time Robert had finished coughing, Ross had gone. He started thinking quickly. Ross didn’t seem exactly sane, honestly, holding a grudge for this long? _He shouldn’t have tried to shoot me,_ Robert thought bitterly. It felt like a very long time ago now, but clearly Ross didn’t think so.

* * *

Robert kept a very close eye on Ross over the coming days and was disappointed and disheartened to find him becoming friendly with the local crazy nutcases and falling in with the crowd Robert liked to avoid. God, that didn’t bode well. Ross also stared at him across the activities room or the cafeteria or the gym. Wherever he could. The skin started prickling on the back of his neck, knowing he was being watched.

“What’s that new guy got against you?” James asked when they were in their cell for the night.

“Who?” Robert asked. Oh. So it was noticeable and Robert wasn’t going mad. 

“Dark hair. Skinny bloke. Crazy eyes.”

“I know him from outside,” Robert settled on. “He’s… not a fan of mine.”

“Do you know what he’s in for?” James asked.

“Yes.” James didn’t push, sensing the subject was closed.

* * *

Aaron could feel the distance from Robert over the next few days and he didn’t know why. It was only when Robert stopped watching for him, stopped trying to catch his eye that Aaron realised how much he’d been relying on it. How much he looked for Robert, how the gaze they shared made his heart jolt in his chest. Now he’d lost that, he felt the cold front of Robert’s indifference. He hadn’t showed up in the library for the last two days either for lunch. Was this still about Aaron snooping into his file? He knew he shouldn’t have done it, but… God, he needed to talk to Robert, it was just finding out how to do it.

* * *

He caught Robert in the allotted time for fresh air that afternoon. There weren’t many inmates out here, but Robert was. “You’ve been avoiding me,” Aaron said, making sure to keep at least three feet of space between them, so it didn’t look like they were having a private conversation.

“What?” Robert said. “Oh, no I haven’t. I’ve been… distracted.”

“By what?” Aaron asked. Robert seemed reluctant. “Is it me? For looking into your file?”

“No,” Robert said. “I’ve got a new problem.”

“Like what?” Aaron asked and Robert shook his head.

“I’m not a grass,” Robert said. “I can’t.”

“I’m not like that,” Aaron said, hurt.

“I know you’re not,” Robert said. “Believe me, I know. But in the end… it’s still us versus you lot.”

“Is it?” Aaron said, losing hope.

“You know it is,” Robert said. “Sorry. I can’t focus… I’ve got too much in my head.”

“Robert, you know…”

“Yeah, I know,” he said, turning away. Aaron felt like he'd said something wrong and he had no clue what it was.


	8. Chapter 8

Cath looked at Aaron while she was clocking out, grabbing her bag and putting her coat on. “What’s wrong with you?” she said.

“Nothing,” Aaron said, grabbing his hoodie and checking the pockets for his car keys which he seemed to have lost.

“You look like a donkeys back end,” Cath said, laughter in her voice.

“Thanks for that,” Aaron said. Where were his sodding keys?

“Go on,” she said. “You can talk to me.”

“I’ve been blindsighted into looking after my teenage sister for a week,” Aaron said. It was true, but it wasn’t why he was annoyed. He wanted to touch Robert, he wanted to have something with him but someone was always watching. And even if no one physically was, the cameras were everywhere.

“Come on, that’s not it,” Cath said. “Coffee? While we talk about it? Which one is it?”

“Which one is what?” Aaron said.

“We’re in close contact with them almost all the time,” Cath said. “Just… don’t let it go to your head. We’ve all been there.”

Aaron went cold. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“They never stop it. Because in the end it’s all about what you can do for them. Has he asked you to bring in anything?”

“What?” Aaron asked, frowning. No, it wasn’t like that with Robert. Was it? Was Robert leading him on for anything he could get? The man was a murderer. He could be stringing this out for his own gain. Could he?

“At least I’ve got you thinking,” Cath said. “Be careful Aaron.”

* * *

“Do you want me to bring you in anything?” 

Robert looked up from his book. He’d gone into the library to genuinely get a new book and Aaron had popped up.

“Are you offering to smuggle me in some contraband?” Robert asked, amused.

“I want to know what you’ll say,” Aaron said, shrugging like he’d regretted speaking. “I didn’t say I’d do it.”

“Dairy milk chocolate,” Robert said, settling on something cheap and easy, but something he really missed.

“That’s what you pick?” Aaron said.

“The chocolate here’s shit. I’ve got a sweet tooth.” Robert closed his book. “It doesn’t matter anyway.” Aaron looked at the ground. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Aaron said, and Robert didn’t believe him.

“Come on.”

“Oh, because you tell me everything that’s bugging you,” Aaron said pointedly.

“Fine,” Robert said, leaving the library. “Be like that.” Aaron found himself shaking his head. What the hell was he doing?

* * *

Aaron had been off with him and Robert didn’t know why. It was bugging him more than it should do, especially with Ross on his mind too. When he got into bed he found a note. It had been hidden in his pillow and he unfolded it to read a scrawl.

_ Sorry about before. I’ve got a lot on my mind. I’ve thought of a way we can be alone. Don’t leave this lying around. _

Robert grinned.

* * *

He hadn’t seen Aaron since the note which he’d reluctantly destroyed but he was still looking forward to Aaron’s plan. God he hoped it worked. The need to spend time with Aaron and know they weren’t being watched was so strong he could taste it. He wanted to touch him, to know how Aaron felt before even getting on to anything else. Which yes, he had spent a lot of time thinking about… anything else. It was lonely in prison sometimes.

Robert felt his arm being forcefully pulled behind him and smashed into the wall. Pain shot through him, making him groan as his arm was broken, he knew that instantly. Three people started beating him up, punches raining down on him and Robert gave up. He curled into a ball trying to protect his broken arm as best he could while waiting for it to stop.

* * *

Aaron had thought of a way to be with Robert for a time, and he was really pleased with himself. Hopefully it would work. That was until he was patrolling the last time on his shift and he saw something that made his heart stop. Robert crumpled on the floor, bleeding and unconscious. He looked terrible, in a heap in the corner. “Robert!” Aaron said, more out of shock than anything, crouching down over him. “Rob, come on, look at me. I’m going to get help.”

“... it can’t be you that finds me,” Robert said, voice slurring a bit. Not so unconscious then.

“Robert, you need a hospital,” Aaron said, trying not to panic.

“S’one else’ll be here in a minute.”

“I can’t leave you,” Aaron said. They both heard footsteps and Aaron stood up. Robert was right, the last thing either of them wanted. No one suspected anything between them specifically (in spite of what Cath said) but they couldn’t start in that direction either.

“Aaron… go,” Robert said. Aaron made a snap decision and did what Robert asked, knowing someone was going to find him. He left.

* * *

It only took Aaron about two minutes to hear the alarm ringing throughout the prison, the blaring noise sending inmates back to their cells. He could reasonably run to find the source of the problem, and he found Cath on her radio, asking for an ambulance quickly. “Jus’ a scratch…” Robert moaned from the floor.

“Of course it is,” Cath said, rolling her eyes.

“What happened?” Aaron asked.

“You’ve been making some enemies,” Cath said, not unkindly to Robert.

“I wan’ sit up.”

“No,” Aaron said. “Don’t move, stay where you are.” It was procedure not to move someone who was injured until the paramedics got there but Aaron was a bit panicked.

“It’s superficial other than his arm,” Cath said, looking at Aaron. “I’ve seen enough of these by now.” Aaron didn’t have the time to say anything else because two paramedics were being led to Robert, checking him out.

“You’re going to have to go to hospital,” a paramedic said. “You might have internal bleeding.”

“Superficial eh?” Aaron said to Cath. She shrugged.

“I’m fine,” Robert said, hating that he was being loaded onto a stretcher and he didn’t have the energy to argue. Especially in front of Aaron.

* * *

Aaron was due to have two days off but he couldn’t possibly go home without finding out how Robert was. It took ages to fill out the incident report and to finally leave the prison. He changed into his normal clothes at the prison, then drove to the hospital, sitting in the car park and thinking about some kind of excuse. He managed to think up a cover story, his mum needed a checkup for her old back injury so he’d driven her in. Just in case. He hurried through the hospital, aware of the rooms they kept for injured prisoners and heading straight towards them. He looked around the corner, seeing one of his colleagues guarding Robert’s room. Phil. Great. Putting a brave face on, he walked up the corridor like he was surprised to see Phil there.

“Oh Aaron!” he said. “You’re not on duty tonight?”

“No,” Aaron said. “My mum needed a lift. I’m just wandering around while the doctor sees her. How are you?”

“Knackered,” Phil said. “It’s boring watching a door. He’s got internal bleeding, he’s not going anywhere.” Aaron forced a smile.

“Why don’t you take a coffee break?” Aaron suggested. “I’ll stay here. I’m not up to much else. I've got to wait anyway.”

Phil considered it. “Okay. Thanks.” Aaron nodded with a don’t mention it kind of shrug and waited until he vanished from sight before looking through the blinds. Robert looked asleep but he also looked in one piece, that was something. He had a cast on his right arm, but he was breathing freely. Knowing he had to be quick, he ducked into the room. The reassuring beeping of machines keeping track of Robert’s heartbeat relaxed him. Robert was okay.

Aaron saw handcuffs on Robert’s left wrist keeping him to the bed and felt hollow. It didn’t normally bother him, but seeing Robert chained up to the hospital bed felt so wrong, inhumane. He looked at the window again before reaching for Robert very slowly, taking his left hand in both of his own. He was warm, he felt very much alive, and Aaron realised this was the first time he was touching him in a non professional way. They’d flirted, the promise of more was always hovering around, he’d seen Robert shirtless but he’d never touched him like this. With affection at least. Aaron checked the window before looking at Robert’s face, calm and relaxed. He couldn’t resist, he ran his fingers through Robert’s messed up hair. Robert looked at him.

“Oh,” Aaron said, feeling stupid. “I thought you were…”

“I was asleep, not unconscious,” Robert said, Aaron dropping his hand. “How long have you been watching me?”

“Not long,” Aaron said. “I don’t think I’ve got long.”

“You’re not working,” Robert said, noticing his clothes.

“No,” Aaron said. “I snuck in.”

“I must be special,” Robert teased.

“How are you feeling?” Aaron asked.

“Sore,” Robert said. “I’m going to be here for a few days. They want to keep me in until the internal bleeding stops.”

“Okay,” Aaron said. “I’m not on shift until Monday, so if you could stay here until then… we can talk. Properly.”

“I’ll do my best,” Robert said, smirking. He wasn’t that ill, he still looked devastatingly attractive and Aaron’s heart jumped. Aaron squeezed his good hand and Robert gripped him tight, not letting go.

“I have to go,” Aaron said.

“I know,” Robert said. “So go.” Aaron looked at him, then shook his head, like trying to get himself out of his stupor. Robert laughed as he left.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is both a slow update and a short chapter, but it REALLY kicked my butt and I had to rewrite big sections of it because it wasn't coming out right. Anyway, I finally got it done and thanks to @susieskinner93 for giving it the once over!

Robert had had a stressful day. The prison service kept asking who beat him up as the “I fell down the stairs” excuse wasn’t exactly working. Robert knew who’d arranged it, even if Ross hadn’t been there in person. But he wasn’t a grass, he had to survive another nine years so he just said he didn’t see who it was but felt there was more than one of them. They were not happy. 

Aaron turned up for the afternoon to evening shift which surprised Robert. “I thought you said…”

“Phil called in sick,” Aaron said. “I’m doing overtime.”

Robert smiled slowly. “Did you volunteer for this?”

“I might have,” Aaron said. “I wanted to see you. How are you feeling?”

“I’m okay,” Robert said. “Bruised but I’ll survive.”

“Who did it to you?”

“Aaron you know I can’t tell you,” Robert said.

“Not… police officer Livesy, just… Aaron,” he said. “I don’t like thinking of you being targeted. I’m not an idiot, I know how prisons work. I know if you tell us you’ll be for it and I don’t want that. But just… an extra pair of eyes looking out for you?”

Robert sighed, thinking about it and Aaron stayed quiet. “I’ve been in prison five years,” Robert said. “I’ve never been beaten up. Not since I arrived when everyone gets roughed up a bit. I’ve been okay for a while. A dozen new transfers arrive at the prison and suddenly I’m in hospital.” He wouldn’t give a name, he couldn’t, even to Aaron. But that was as far as he’d go.

Aaron nodded, understanding. “Okay,” he said.

Robert lifted his handcuffed left wrist. “Can you let me go? I need the bog.” Aaron nodded, undoing the metal ring holding him to the bed. Robert turned over his hand and touched the inside of Aaron’s wrist. A brush of skin that made Aaron shiver. It shouldn’t, it was so minimal. But it did. Robert’s eyes flicked to the bathroom and Aaron got the message. It was a risk, but there weren’t CCTV cameras in the bathroom so… was it worth it? Robert went to the bathroom and Aaron waited until it looked like he might be checking up on Robert for taking too long. He opened the door, Robert looked at him as he closed the door behind him. Both of them were alone, truly alone for the first time.

“This isn’t a good idea,” Aaron said.

“No,” Robert agreed. “It’s a terrible idea.” Aaron looked up at him and Robert appreciated the height difference between them and how blue Aaron’s eyes were. He was gorgeous. Robert leaned forward and kissed him very softly, knowing he was taking a risk. A peck really, nothing more. He backed off and looked in Aaron’s eyes, but he was smirking and Robert became more sure of himself. He smiled as he kissed Aaron again, deeper this time, Robert’s good hand on the back of Aaron’s neck and pulling him closer. Aaron almost sighed into it, pushing Robert against the closed bathroom door, his hands almost clutching at Robert. God, Aaron poured himself into that kiss, touching Robert everywhere he could, his hand stroking up and down Robert’s back, bodies pressed tightly together. 

“We shouldn’t be doing this,” Aaron said, breathing heavily. It would be more convincing if he hadn’t been staring at Robert’s mouth like he was hypnotised.

“Well, yeah,” Robert said. “On the other hand we need to make the most of these seconds because we don’t know how long we’ve got.”

“Good point,” Aaron said, hands on Robert’s hips and kissing him again. Robert smiled into it, feeling so good to touch someone, so good to have Aaron’s hands on him. He’d wanted it for so long and now he had it, Robert wanted to spend about four days in bed with him, but that didn’t seem particularly likely.

Robert kissed into Aaron’s neck and he sighed, then moaned. “Oh, you like that,” Robert said, teasing lightly.

“...yeah,” Aaron whispered, closing his eyes and enjoying Robert’s lips against his sensitive skin. “Oh God…”

“I like knowing where your weak spots are,” Robert said, kissing his mouth again.

“Oh!” They broke apart to find a nurse having burst into the bathroom. She had raised eyebrows and was watching them both while Robert’s face flamed. God, no. They couldn’t be caught. “Don’t mind me,” she said. “I just needed to check your vitals but apparently you’re feeling just fine.” Robert looked at Aaron, fearful that this would get out. Aaron was readjusting his uniform so it wasn’t rumpled from Robert’s fingers while the nurse looked at her clipboard.

“I need to check your blood pressure.” Robert reluctantly got back in a hospital bed and did what he was told, Aaron clicking the handcuffs on with regret.

“Are you…” Aaron said. “Going to mention that?”

“Mention what?” she said with a smile and taking the reading on the monitor. “I could, but if I did I’d have fifty pages of forms to fill in and a police interview while I’m accusing one of their own of improper behaviour. No thanks.” She seemed sincere enough and Aaron looked at Robert, wondering if she could be trusted.

“Look, it’s never going to happen again,” Robert said. “There’s no need to talk about it, right?”

“Right,” the nurse said. “But bloody hell guys. Lock the door if you don’t want to be disturbed. I’m going to be processing your discharge forms, so people will be coming in and out…”

“Got it,” Aaron said tersely. He felt like a school kid being told off.


	10. Chapter 10

It took a while and a lot of paperwork for Robert to be processed back to the prison from hospital. It was boring and long winded, but eventually Aaron turned up at the prison with Robert in the back who’d lost some of his usual smirk. Not much though.

“Home sweet home, right?” Robert said, rolling his eyes. Aaron had to lead Robert through the prison to a private room to be searched.  “I’ve got a broken wrist and I’ve been chained to a hospital bed,” Robert said. “What could I possibly be smuggling in?”

Aaron shook his head. He pat Robert down, like he’d been trained to do. “You’re enjoying this,” Robert said, feeling Aaron's hands against his body.

“Would you shut up!” Aaron hissed, straightening up and glaring at him. “This is a job! I didn’t expect to…”

“To what?” Robert asked. Aaron moved closer and kissed him. Robert wrapped his arms tightly around him, unsure of when they’d next be able to touch and making the most of it. “I promise I’m not bringing any contraband into the prison.”

“I know,” Aaron said. He kissed behind Robert’s ear and whispered, “I want more of you. This isn’t enough.”

“It’s what we have,” Robert said with regret. They heard footsteps and Aaron left the room, talking to one of the other guards outside and Robert ignored it. This wasn’t fair.

* * *

James was lounging around in their cell when Robert came back. “Nice weekend trip?” he quipped.

“Oh, amazing.”

“Seriously, are you alright?”

“I’ll live,” Robert said, looking at his right arm in its cast. James knew Robert wouldn’t tell him who it was so he didn’t bother asking.

“I got a date for my appeal,” James said. “It’s next week.”

“That’s soon,” Robert said in surprise.

“They had a space open up,” James said. “I’m not complaining.

“What about… Ellie?” Robert said quietly.

“She exists outside these four walls,” James said. “At the moment, I don’t.” Robert couldn’t really argue with that.

* * *

Robert was alone in his cell when Aaron came in. “What do you want?”

“We’ve been told to keep an eye on you,” Aaron said. “To try and get you to tell us who beat you up.”

“You know I won’t,” Robert said.

“You’ll tell me when you’re good and ready,” Aaron said, shrugging. “I’m not about to push. But I do have orders to keep trying to find out, so that means spending time with you.”

“Even if I’m doing nothing more interesting than reading a book?”

“Even then,” Aaron agreed. He sat down on the chair and it felt weird, Aaron just hanging out with him. Like they were normal people. Aaron fell quiet and eventually Robert felt like he needed to talk. Aaron had turned into the person he relied on the most, the least he could do was be honest with him. He put a bookmark in and thought about how to start.

“Lee Posner,” Robert said. Aaron looked at him blankly. “That’s the man I killed.”

“Right,” Aaron said, thinking quickly. “Are you not going to give me any more to go on?”

“I’m glad he’s dead, and I don’t regret it,” Robert said. “No matter how long they lock me up for.”

“I don’t think that’s the way prison’s meant to work,” Aaron said. Robert shrugged.

“If I tell you he raped my sister?” Robert said. Aaron stayed silent. “She reported it to the police, she did the right thing, but it... she took too long. There wasn’t any…” Robert swallowed uncomfortably. “Physical evidence so the police couldn’t or wouldn’t prosecute. Even if there had been I don’t think Vic… that’s my sister. I don’t think she’d have got a conviction against him anyway.”

“Why?” Aaron asked as quietly as he could. Robert almost seemed in a trance, recounting everything and he didn’t want to break that. From curiosity he desperately wanted to know, and now that Robert had started, he felt terrible about the situation.

“Because Vic got pregnant,” Robert said, looking at his hands. “It happened after a night clubbing and she kept the baby so… he’d never have been convicted.”

“I’m sorry,” Aaron said, feeling that was useless.

“Vic wanted me to leave him alone, and I hated doing that but I listened to her. She’s my little sister, I’d do anything she asked.”

“But?” Aaron prompted.

“That scum came around. Vic couldn’t even stay in her house and he wanted access to the baby? Or paying off so he wouldn’t have contact? And even then I was so angry but I’d have left it. I… we just wanted him out of our lives for good. But then, outside the house… I know he was baiting me and taunting me. It worked. He said hearing a “no” made it more exciting, more thrilling and no never really means no. I grabbed a shovel and I hit him over the head.” Robert shrugged. “I didn’t mean to kill him, I didn't plan it. I just saw red. But I’m not sorry he’s dead and I never will be.”

“Vic… your sister?”

“She's lost her brother,” Robert said. “Because I’m rotting away in here while she’s out there.”

“Did she have the baby?”

“Yeah,” Robert said. “Harry. I’ve not met him.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t want to see him,” Robert said simply. “I don’t want Vic to see me in here either. I don’t want her to worry.”

“It’s not Harry’s fault about his father,” Aaron said quietly and Robert looked at him, wondering where the quiet conviction came from.

“I know that,” Robert said. “I’m scared that I’ll look at him and see the guy I killed.”

“All you’ll probably see is your nephew and your sister,” Aaron said. “Trust me. Let her visit you. I bet she wants to if you’re as close as you say.”

“We used to be,” Robert said. “She’s probably got a brand new life now. Anyway, that’s my story.”

“You got fourteen years for that?” Aaron asked in disbelief.

“I pleaded guilty, because I was guilty. I am. But the rape couldn’t be used in court because there was no evidence, so it just looked like I’d hit my sisters.... _Boyfriend_…” Robert looked disgusted as he said the word. “Because I didn’t like him.”

“That’s really unfair,” Aaron said.

“Yeah,” Robert said. “Look it up on my file if you don’t believe me.”

“I never said I didn’t believe you,” Aaron said. “You had a hack lawyer though. It should have been manslaughter.”

“There… might have been a video he filmed about 3 weeks before that I threatened to kill him,” Robert said. “I didn’t mean it, you know. People say “I’m going to kill you!” all the time without meaning it. But it looked bad. Fourteen years isn’t a lot for murder, not really.”

“You don’t deserve to be here,” Aaron said. Robert’s eyes softened.

“You’re biased.”

“No, I’m not,” Aaron said. “I got to know you, that’s all.” Robert smiled at him. 

“I wish we could have met some place else,” Robert said. “Not here and now.”

Aaron smiled sadly. “You wouldn’t have gone for me.”

“Why not?”

“I was a loud mouth violent almost ex con,” Aaron said. “Handy with my fists. You look like you should be in an office.”

“That shows how much you don’t know me,” Robert said, teasing him. “How did you get this job then?”

“A PR exercise to show rehabilitation works,” Aaron said rolling his eyes.

“I grew up on a farm,” Robert said. “I don’t know why you think I’m an office pen pusher.”

“You’re not a farm boy,” Aaron said, amused.

“I tried hard not to be,” Robert said. “It doesn’t matter in the end I guess. We both of us ended up here.”

“True, I guess,” Aaron said. “What would we do? If we met in the real world?”

“Like a bar?”

“Sure,” Aaron said.

“What would you be wearing?” Robert asked, definitely flirting.

“Usually jeans and a hoodie,” Aaron said.

“Mm, bet you’d look good,” Robert said. “I’d look at you slowly.” Robert dragged his eyes up and down Aaron’s figure in illustration. “Then I’d buy you a drink and after a while I’d ask if you wanted to come back to mine.”

“I thought you’d be smoother than that,” Aaron said.

“I’m out of practise, it’s been a while,” Robert said. “Plus… I don’t think you’d be turning me down.”

“You’re not irresistible,” Aaron said.

“Imagine me with my hair styled properly,” Robert said. “In a leather jacket and really well fitting clothes. You can’t resist me in a baggy prison uniform.” Aaron laughed easily.

“I’d love to argue with you.”

“But you can’t.” Both men laughed.


	11. Chapter 11

Aaron logged on to the prison system. He typed “Lee Posner” into the search bar, wondering if it had an unusual spelling. Three Lee Posners turned up. One was in a London prison on a long stretch, so Aaron ruled that one out. Two were in the Yorkshire area. He clicked both of them and they were both similar ages. He found the one who had “deceased” on it and clicked through. Yep, it was the right Lee Posner.

There were a few parking tickets on his file, but nothing that made him look monstrous. Not that that meant anything, Aaron knew. He clicked through to interviews. Every police interview was recorded and added to the system, and he had a lot of police interviews on record for someone with only parking fines. Aaron read the case numbers on the interviews and there were a total of five different cases he’d been interviewed for. Aaron clicked through the one at the top of the list, looking at the dates and realised he was probably looking at Robert’s sisters case. Names of rape complainants were kept private, at least on a simple search like this. He’d have to click to hear the interview to know for sure.

There were four more, going back over three years or so and every one was for a rape case that had subsequently been dropped. Did Robert know? Did he know it wasn’t just Vic? He must have suspected, but if five women had reported him for rape… how many more were there? Robert was right. He had done the world a favour killing that scum.

Aaron logged off, staring into space as he thought about it. “Everything okay?” Cath asked.

“Yeah, I’m just thinking,” Aaron said. “It’s good. Got a day off tomorrow, so…”

“Who were you looking up?” she asked, nodding at the computer.

“Sugden,” Aaron said, being honest. He didn’t know why. “He’s not like the others.”

“What’s he in for?” Cath asked, studying Aaron closely.

“Oh come off it, you’ve never looked anyone up?”

“Yeah,” she said. “When I was worried for my safety, but I have a feeling this isn’t that. Did he ask you to look up his case?”

“No,” Aaron said. “I wanted to know.”

“Is it Sugden you’ve got a thing for?” she asked as Aaron followed her to the lockers, before going home.

“I don’t have a thing for anyone,” Aaron said. “It’s nothing.”

“What’s he in prison for then?”

“Murder,” Aaron said, feeling that pointing out he killed a rapist wasn’t a good idea right now.

“Maybe that’ll keep you away from him,” she said.

“Why are you so interested?!” Aaron snapped.

“I’m a woman who’s worked in male prisons for nearly thirty years,” she said. “You think I’ve never been tempted?”

“What’s your story then?” Aaron asked as Cath put her coat on.

“Smooth talker, really good looking man who was in prison for theft and fraud. This was… what twenty five years ago now? God I’m getting old.”

“What happened?”

“Er…” Cath smiled to herself. “Nothing.”

“Go on.”

“We’ve just celebrated our twentieth wedding anniversary.”

Aaron paused. “That’s quite a cautionary tale there, Cath,” he said sarcastically.

“Yeah, well it was also the reason I was never promoted or given a pay rise,” she said. “I get it, I really do, but God, you need to be careful.” Aaron didn’t say anything as she left.

* * *

Robert didn’t see Aaron for four days. After everything they’d been through recently, it felt like an absolute age. Eventually Robert did find him in the library for lunch. “I’ve not seen you lately,” Robert said, faking perusing the books, but it was hard not to look at Aaron after that kiss at the hospital.

“I’ve been keeping my distance.”

“Why?” Robert asked.

“One of the guards is on to us,” Aaron said. Robert gave up pretending interest in the books.

“Who?” 

“Cath,” Aaron said. “She knows. She’s not said as much but she does.”

“If she’s not said…”

“I know,” Aaron said. “Just trust me.”

“Okay,” Robert said, thinking quickly. “Is she going to say anything?”

“I don’t think so,” Aaron said. “But we should be careful.” 

Robert looked over his shoulder. “But I want to see you.”

“I know,” Aaron said again.

“What was your plan?” Robert asked. “To meet alone?”

“It doesn’t matter now,” Aaron said. “The window of opportunity has gone.” Robert looked at him. “The shower block needed to be closed at the weekend and they were using the opportunity to service the cameras at the same time. We’d have had about an hour.”

“Oh, the weekend I was in hospital?” Aaron nodded. “An hour? God the things I could do to you in an hour.” Aaron went red and Robert laughed. “We’ll think of something.”

“You sound sure of yourself,” Aaron said.

“I usually get what I want in the end,” Robert said.

“Smug and arrogant you are,” Aaron said.

“You like that about me,” Robert said with confidence.

* * *

“How was the weekend trip?” Robert looked up from his meal in the cafeteria to see Ross’s smug face, a face he wanted to punch if his right hand was working.

“What do you want?” Robert asked.

“You need to watch your back.”

“Look, you’ve made your point,” Robert said. “I’m not going to be anyone's punching bag, you got one free shot. You don’t get another.”

“Oh, what are you going to do, go crying to the prison service?” Ross asked in an annoying sing song kinda voice.

“If anyone put it together that the attempted murder you’re in prison for is mine, you’d be moved out of here.”

“Or you would be,” Ross said. “I’ve just got here, they can’t move me again. It makes them look bad.” Robert paused because he had a point. The last thing Robert wanted was to move prisons right now.

“What’s your problem with me anyway? I should be the one pissed, I’m the one you shot. I’d be dead if you had your way,” Robert said.

“I’m in here for shooting you,” Ross said. “Who’d care if I finished the job?”

“Leave me alone,” Robert said. “I can make your life very uncomfortable.” Ross just laughed as he left.

* * *

“I’m getting out.” Robert looked at James in surprise. Most appeals weren’t successful, even though inmates really hung their hats on them.

“Really?”

“Yeah, the judge agreed my sentence was too harsh. I’m going home tomorrow!”

“Congratulations,” Robert said, now fearing who his next cellmate would be. James kept to himself and he liked that, even if they didn’t always get on.

“Sound like you mean it,” James said.

“I do mean it,” Robert said. “Get out of here and never come back.”

“I won’t be back,” James said. Robert hoped he wouldn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not really a fan of this chapter, but hey, needs must!! Thank you for the comments, they really help the update speed!


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